Friday, March 30, 2012

Friday of the Fifth Week of Lent

Psalm 141Exodus 9:13-352 Corinthians 4:1-12Mark 10:32-45

As I write this, I am thinking of a friend who took her own life a week ago. In 2 Corinthians 4, Paul speaks of carrying the light of God . . . “So death is at work in us, but life in you.” It is not in our nature to ponder at length on those who have died. Death is sad, but you grieve and must move on. Pray tell, though . . . how can death work in us? Upon hearing of my friend’s departing, I was keenly aware of how I am not present to those in my life, especially her. I would ‘someday’ get around to having lunch with her when work was not so busy . . . I’ll read the draft book of her life she sent me via email (marked that as a to-do) . . . would join her for those philosophical discussions. Someday. The dark side of the “what if’s” is within reach to hold on to. I can count myself as one of those “perplexed, but not driven to despair.”

I can almost empathize with Pharaoh not listening. I was not listening to her and probably am not hearing many friends in need, much less God. How do I let the light shine out of the darkness on a daily basis? I choose to let the life of Jesus be manifest in my body, as well as all those whom I have loved, and live within me . . . they shine for all who are left on this earth within me. “But my eyes are turned toward you, O God, my Lord; in you I seek refuge; do not leave me defenseless.” Amen.

P.S. For this Lent I plan not only giving up television, but each day taking on meeting with, calling, or writing (computer-related communication not counting) a friend or relative I regularly do not have contact with.

— Denni Conner

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